Are you already feeling behind this January? Everyone’s posting their big 2026 goals while you’re just trying to get through the week. Here’s the truth: that voice telling you to do more isn’t telling you the truth. And I have evidence.
In this episode, I’m sharing why rest isn’t the obstacle to a good year – it’s the foundation. If you’re tired of the “new year, new you” pressure and want to start 2026 with intention instead of intensity, this one’s for you.
The 21-Day Habit Myth (And Why You’re Not Behind)
That whole “21 days to build a habit” thing? Complete bullshit. It was made up by a plastic surgeon in the 1960s watching people adjust to their new noses. Real research says habits take two to three months minimum. So if you started something on January 1st and you’re already wobbling, you’re not failing. You’re on a completely normal human timeline. Give yourself until March.
Why Self-Compassion Beats Self-Criticism
When you mess up, that inner drill sergeant doesn’t help – it paralyses you. Research shows being kind to yourself after a slip makes you MORE likely to try again. Self-criticism? It’s sabotage disguised as discipline. Next time you fall off the wagon, ask yourself: what would I say to a friend right now? Then say that to yourself.
Design for Actual You, Not Fantasy You
Big January goals fail because they’re designed for the version of you who wakes at 5am and never has a shit day. But that’s not who’s doing the thing. Start embarrassingly small – floss one tooth, not your whole mouth. And before asking “what should I add?”, try “what do I need to stop?” Most habits don’t fail because we lack discipline. They fail because we’re trying to add them to a life that’s already full.
Three Key Takeaways
1️⃣ Habits take 2-3 months, not 21 days. Stop checking in after three weeks wondering why it’s not automatic. Give yourself until spring.
2️⃣ Compassion keeps you in the game. What actually matters isn’t never messing up – it’s knowing how to come back without starting over.
3️⃣ You don’t need to try harder this year. You need to make space first. Subtraction before addition. Clear the noise before you add more sound.
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